Seriously! I've put this off about as long as I can. I even have a new elliptical machine waiting and ready. So, what's my problem? I think it's called motivation. Even though I'm not happy with how my body looks, feels, etc., Brian says I look great. Now he's my husband so what do I expect right? For those of you who know Brian know that he calls things as he sees them. It's black or white... no gray with him. But what about how I feel about myself and why am I dragging my feet?
Could it be, because I'm comfortable with being insecure? After all, change is hard, it takes time.. and the road bumps you incur. Really? Why would I want to do all that? I'll feel better, hopefully look better, and be in general overall better health.
In contemplating this venture, I've had to dig deep into my heart, soul and mind. It will take all of me to accomplish the goal that I have set forth. I need to be held accountable (girlfriends, this is where you come in to play), I need to be motivated (seeing results sooner than later), and I need to keep in mind that I need my body to be the best that I can make it with what I have. That doesn't mean I'll be a size 4. That means when I get to the size that I feel comfortable and appreciate the way I look... I maintain. What is a good size for me is not a good size for others.
I'm committing my exercise time to also spend time talking to my Lord. What time is better spent than having a conversation with your best friend and someone who cares about my heart? Hopefully a little soul talk while I walk, run or ellipticize will give me a healthier heart to follow God's will in my life.
Time well spent don't you think? So, I'm off the couch.....
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. ~ Colossians 3:15-17
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Thursday, February 11, 2010
So Long Insecurity
... you've been a bad friend. I'm starting my first on-line blogging book study today. Led by Beth Moore. It's her new book that was released on February 2, 2010.
I was sharing with Brian that I was doing this study... he didn't get it. Actually he said, "What do you have to be insecure about?" Oh, if only I could have his outlook, I probably wouldn't be covered in hives right now, would I? I simply responded, I am a woman I compare myself to every other woman out there and what they can do that I can't, what they do that is better than I can do, hair color, nails, figure... the list goes on and on and on. It's been comforting to know tat I'm NOT the only woman that struggles with these thoughts. I know... these thoughts are not of God... but, I'm human.
Satan loves to badger us. He's constantly putting my past in front of me... secretly saying... Angela, you can't do this, you can't do that... remember when? That's when I find my self repeating "For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins." Colossians 1:13-14. That's right... God saved me from all my past transgressions and sins... by sending His Son to pay the price on that old rugged cross. Makes me want to burst out in song... Oh what a Savior... oh hallelujah"
All this to say, God saved me from my sins.... now it's up to me to allow Him to get rid of the rest of the "junk"... that bogs me down and keeps me from serving Him 100% along side my fellow sistas and friends. Meaning... letting go of ALL my insecurities, and knowing that I am wonderfully made.
How about it... let's do this!
I was sharing with Brian that I was doing this study... he didn't get it. Actually he said, "What do you have to be insecure about?" Oh, if only I could have his outlook, I probably wouldn't be covered in hives right now, would I? I simply responded, I am a woman I compare myself to every other woman out there and what they can do that I can't, what they do that is better than I can do, hair color, nails, figure... the list goes on and on and on. It's been comforting to know tat I'm NOT the only woman that struggles with these thoughts. I know... these thoughts are not of God... but, I'm human.
Satan loves to badger us. He's constantly putting my past in front of me... secretly saying... Angela, you can't do this, you can't do that... remember when? That's when I find my self repeating "For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins." Colossians 1:13-14. That's right... God saved me from all my past transgressions and sins... by sending His Son to pay the price on that old rugged cross. Makes me want to burst out in song... Oh what a Savior... oh hallelujah"
All this to say, God saved me from my sins.... now it's up to me to allow Him to get rid of the rest of the "junk"... that bogs me down and keeps me from serving Him 100% along side my fellow sistas and friends. Meaning... letting go of ALL my insecurities, and knowing that I am wonderfully made.
How about it... let's do this!
Friday, February 5, 2010
God Blessed the Broken Road...
... that lead me straight to Brian! On February 7th, Brian and I celebrate our first "date". That was five years ago. Significant? Maybe not to some, but to us~ yes! You see I spent the first 15 years (yes, you read that correctly) of my adult life making decisions on my own, not asking my Heavenly Father for advice, guidance or blessings. Where did that get me? Down a long hard, dry, rotten road. I did everything I knew I shouldn't do...and in the long run, I ended up divorced, single and pregnant and on a road to self destruction.
What changed? My parents. They had done all they could do, tried all they could try. I was destroying myself... at a very rapid pace. They prayed to God, and put my life in God's hands. That may sound insignificant to you... but that's when things started to change. I realized I didn't need a man to complete me... Austin didn't need just "anyone" to be a father figure... I had a God who wanted to provide that for us.
I met Brian in the "untraditional" way... on the internet. The safest? Probably not. I can tell you this though, from the first moment we met on February 7th, 2005, when he took my hand, it felt as if I had come home. The safest place I had ever been.
God knew what man I needed in my life... and when I would meet him. I love Brian more than anything. He's my friend, my confidant, my whole world. What's best... he accepted the whole package, Austin and Harley. He got a three for one special.
Don't get me wrong, we've had our ups and downs.... but God did Bless the Broken Road that led me straight to Brian! I love you Droop!
What changed? My parents. They had done all they could do, tried all they could try. I was destroying myself... at a very rapid pace. They prayed to God, and put my life in God's hands. That may sound insignificant to you... but that's when things started to change. I realized I didn't need a man to complete me... Austin didn't need just "anyone" to be a father figure... I had a God who wanted to provide that for us.
I met Brian in the "untraditional" way... on the internet. The safest? Probably not. I can tell you this though, from the first moment we met on February 7th, 2005, when he took my hand, it felt as if I had come home. The safest place I had ever been.
God knew what man I needed in my life... and when I would meet him. I love Brian more than anything. He's my friend, my confidant, my whole world. What's best... he accepted the whole package, Austin and Harley. He got a three for one special.
Don't get me wrong, we've had our ups and downs.... but God did Bless the Broken Road that led me straight to Brian! I love you Droop!
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